WWE Draft and POOPPOOP

So my brother bought an XBOX 360 and XBOX live. The first thing he does with Live is downloads a game demo. Pretty neat huh? It's Phantasy Gay Star Online something. Anyway, I think it's amazing and hilarious that the very first thing we see when he zones into this new fabulous online world is a guy running in circles yelling "POOPPOOP". The internet is awesome.

Last night was the WWE draft. It went down about like I expected. There were more big names moved than I thought, but I guess the WWE likes to do that sometimes. I'm writing this early because I haven't read any reaction to the draft yet and I want to try to remain unswayed. Yeah fuck you, I'm THAT nerdy.

Edge def. Cena by Countout --> Khali to Smackdown

This was kind of obvious. Khali had nowhere else to go on RAW after getting rocked by Cena. Now he'll probably just coast along in another high profile feud until his contract is up and he disappears back to the jungles of the Punjab.

CM Punk def. Carlito --> Boogeyman to ECW

First off, I was a little disappointed that a pretty solid midcarder match wound up in this pretty insignificant move. Punk and Carlito had a pretty good amount of chemistry going on, and they both sold their butts off. Good work fellas. But Boogeyman? I guess he can feud with Kevin Thorn or something. I liked what he had going with Kane though. They always do this to Kane. He gets something that works, and they fuck him in the butt with... stuff.

Umaga squashed Balls Mahoney --> King Booker to RAW

Balls Mahoney is so mistreated. I love Booker though. This could really work out well for his character. I could really see him coming back as a goofy face and rocking Umaga.

Lashley def. Beniot --> Benoit to ECW

Lashley still can't wrestle that well, but he showed some real power and amateur skillz. Beniot is still the man, and this move was way obvious. He was rotting on Friday nights, and he is the proud producer of one of the biggest spots in ECW history even though he wasn't there terribly long. He immediately jumps up into the main event ranks with RVD and....(insert).

MVP def. Santino --> Torrie Wilson to Smackdown

::yawn:: Santino still ain't much of a wrestler and holy shit did MVP learn from Beniot or what. I just found out a few days ago that MVP has a couple ugly ass black power tattoos on his chest from prison, and that's fucking awesome.

Snitsky squashed the Miz, but Miz won due to overdoing the beatdown --> Chris Masters to Smackdown

Masters was probably a sure bet too. I guess he now goes and rots in blue and white rather than red and black. Oh well.

Candice def. Krystal --> Bobby Lashley to RAW

And Lashley was stripped of the ECW title. I like the angle. Now Bobby goes to RAW and maybe the McMahon thing is behind him with both men coming out on top. Neat. The woman's match was horrid as expected, but Candice really isn't that bad anymore. I'm not sure where there's room for Lashley on RAW, especially if HHH and HBK come back by Summerslam. Oh well.

Batista def. Jeff Hardy & Elijah Burke --> Ric Flair to Smackdown

Wow. Batista fucking turned it UP tonight. Now I see why people still pop for him. That was pretty damn good. Hardy and Burke didn't do bad themselves neither. Flair is awesome and will be awesome anywhere. Maybe on Smackdown he gets a REAL push and holds at least one more non-Tag title.

15-Man Battle Royale won by Randy Orton --> Snitsky and Kennedy to RAW

It was kind of obvious that Orton was winning this as he was the biggest name in there. A few things are of note from the match itself... they bury ECW like crazy. Dreamer, Thorn, the Sandman, and Striker all went out way fucking early. That was craptastic. They had an opportunity to showcase Nitro and Dykstra, but didn't. Matt Hardy looked pretty good. But the definitely highlight was the HUGE pop that was given when the ring was cleared and Viscera and Mark Henry spotted each other. Now that was epic. Big Vis may still be a bit of a jobber, but holy fuck he's still scary. I need a video of that moment when he yelled and charged with his white eyes blazing and gold teeth glowing. That was a fucking moment. And Mark Henry just looks like he's ready to rape anyone at any given time, and then rip off their arm and beat... something with it. Anyways, Snitsky moving appears insignificant. They have been building him up for months... for this? Gay. Kennedy to RAW is big however. Hopefully he comes back with a HUGE push and goes right for Cena, but with Lashley, Orton, and Umaga crowding it up... I doubt that's the case.

Clearly the belt needs to come off Cena soon, and I think they know that. I also think they know that Umaga and Orton aren't really credible champs at the moment. Lashley would sort of work, but he's still green. I think Kennedy is ready. If they give him, I dunno, some real publicity and time to talk? Like put him on the Tonight Show. Introduce the world to him like they do for Cena and Edge, that would rock nutsacks across the world.

But the event that overshadowed it all was the creepy ending to RAW. The McMahon appreciation skits were GREAT. Bret Hart on RAW?!? The Iron Sheik speaks (sort of)? Rowdy Roddy comes back? Etc etc etc. It was pretty damn good and cool. McMahon's ending was so odd though. The creepy walk to the ring, then in the back with all the wrestlers who didn't perform tonight--that was odd. But the blowing up of the limo was REALLY good. I mean, REALLY well done even if Vince still can't act. WWE can still do special effects well, that's for sure. And they can still you know, pull a turd out of a hat and make you wonder how pooppoop came from there. I'm really hooked. Next week's RAW should be interesting.

Last note, the next ppv should be AWESOME. The whole "every belt defended" thing is going to be way good. Especially when they claim the main event is WWE Champion John Cena v. Randy Orton v. King Booker v. Mick Foley v. Lashley. Wow that's a lot of good names. WWE could either really rock assholes the next weeks to come, or of course, blow it and suck their grandpa's cock. We'll see.

ECW

As you fellers know, I am a huge pro wrestling fan. From RAW, all the way down to Chikara, I pretty much love it all. However, I am always disappointed by the "IWC"... Internet Wrestling Community. There are all these goobers running around, writing columns about various topics, and my general conclusion is that these fucks living in their mother's basement don't know snakes from dildos about anything.

Evidence. The article entitled Pro's From the Palace. His last article is talking about how ECW died with Vince as the champ, and also talks about how Tommy Dreamer's "reaction" on wwe.com was just that--a reaction, a shoot, an honest opinion. He proposes the idea that Dreamer is truly offended at this storyling. Well, that's possible in some sense I believe, but c'mon. That's ridiculous. Who pays Dreamer's salary? Don't get me wrong, I love Tommy Dreamer and he really was/is the embodiment of what ECW was all about, but if he truly gave a fuck about ECW he would have jumped off of this WWECW creation long ago and gone back to the indies. No matter what his true feelings, it's clear that he has sold out--at least a LITTLE bit.

I still say the first ECW One Night Stand PPV is the last glimpse anyone is going to get of the old ECW. Now it's time to move on and cheer on ROH. It's a new era.

My last thought is about the IWC again. This "community" really is full of gibbering idiots. The baseball community that I'm active in is smart. People put forth ideas, run some stats if needed, propose their thoughts, but they always...ALWAYS... say them in a way that shows that nobody outside of a MLB front office knows anything--we can only guess. The IWC needs to quit pretending they are backstage, or on the creative staff, or used to drink beer and snort coke with Sabu back in 1995. Give me a fucking break.

And my last thought about this post in general. I believe there are 2 successful routes the WWECW can go in. If they don't hit one of these on the head, then we just have another version of Heat, or Shotgun Saturday Night. 1) Make it the original ECW. 2) Make it another Smackdown/Raw. Now I know these are obvious, and I know EVERYONE wants to see #1, but come on. It's impossible. The original ECW was in front of crowds about 1000 smart people on average I'd guess. That's so small, and promotes energy. Today the WWECW is in front of arenas of jackass children and yokels. Won't work. So as for #2, they are on their way. What do you need to make a show/belt respectable? Have a good champ. They have done that for the most part, with RVD, Big Show, and Lashley. Now the Vince thing. Nobody really LIKES it, but it gets the brand attention. Vince went from the huge Trump Wrestlemania thing, and now to ECW. That will give it attention clearly. Also, I am enjoying this McMahon-Lashley feud a lot. It just has a different feel than the other shitty McMahon feuds.

But. If in 6 months Dreamer, Sandman, RVD, Balls, Stevie Richards, etc. are all gone and there aren't good replacements at the level of CM Punk and Colt Cabana... I'll have a hard time watching. A show will not succeed at a marketing level with just the New Breed, Umaga, and Lashley as their top draw. I'm pretty sure of that. But hell... WWE creative may fuck up sometimes, but they hit one on the head other times as well. Get to it guys.

What a break from posting.

I think we all know what happened here at Virginia Tech. Let's not talk about it here.

And Shark Boy came to Alleghany High School.... and stunk the joint up. Blah. Awful wrestling.

Let me throw a few thoughts out there.

1) The past Monday Night Raw was excellent. Khali is the bomb, and I really, really hope that somehow the belt falls off of Cena within the past 2 months. There are several small things to complain about on Raw lately, but that's the only glaring problem. Belts have to be exchanged on occasion in order to maintain their legacy. Cena has, in effect, held the belt for damn near 2 years. That's insane.

2) I SHOULD be completely annoyed by Vince having the ECW title, but by god, I kind of like it just for a) the publicity for ECW, and b) it creates a focal point for hatred from the Originals. And I like that.

3) HOW BOUT DEM BRAVES?! I know it's only May 1st, but damn they're playing good.

4) At first I didn't like the Ryan Langerhans trade, then I realized in non-fanboy mode that he is 27 years old and has never been better than a 4th outfielder. Sure, he has a fun name, but those pretty much grow on trees. Pujols. Hehehehehe.